366
by M.D. Owen
Summary: Shadow tackles a year-long project to give her Grandpa Splinter a smile each day. Shadow narrates, mentions of the other TMNT, Casey, April. 2010 SS TMNT Awards: 2nd place, best short work


During a winter that could snap your nipples in half, Master Splinter was having a particularly rough time. My ten year old eyes saw him struggling to move around his home and only I could hear his whimpers at nighttime from my bed. Dad and Mama-April had to work long shifts, and when I got tired of seeing the same four walls of our dingy apartment, I asked to stay with Splinter on various nights. It was surprisingly fun with the elder rat.

miss him. I just needed to get that out of my system.

His sons, my uncles, were never mean or bad to him, but I could tell that they had their own agendas and heartaches. Even a ten year old could see when someone was lonely. Splinter needed my assistance, and I was determined to make him smile each day.

So, Mama-April gave me a wonderful suggestion one day when she was helping me with my math homework. I hated math, the very core of my adolescent aggravation and I hated being married to it for so long. I almost gave birth to its babies. Splinter helped me with math although he wasn't terribly good at it.

_X + Y = Z ?_

You should have seen his face when I showed him algorithms (_I attended an advanced class.._). We gave up and baked cookies.

Anyways, Mama-April had a twinkle in her eye when she told me of a gift that lasted all year. I said how so? A fresh piece of paper was whipped out and she asked me to brainstorm different things that I liked about Master Splinter. I scribbled out about five things, hit more steam and rolled out ten, but then I stopped. Then, with a tender hearted congratulations followed by a sneaky grin, she said I had to come up with three hundred and sixty five different things that I liked about him.

Actually, three hundred and sixty six since the following year would leap.

Don't judge me too harshly; I adored Splinter but coming up with three hundred and sixty SIX things was as difficult as break dancing with a math equation. Determination and strength flowed in my veins, however, and all I had to remember was seeing him on harsh winter nights, a sorrowful look painted on that fuzzy face. My heart broke again and it fueled my writing.

January 1st: you always smell good.

He said he imported a specific scent straight from Japan, but I had to keep it secret because he raided Raphael's secret stash for the costs. I felt special!

* * *

February 29th (leap): you have great taste in women.

And I was his favorite woman.

* * *

March 17th: you keep your nails trimmed.

I'm a woman and look more like a werewolf each day.

* * *

April 1st: you're my favorite turtle. No joke.

Actually, it's a tie between him and Uncle Mike, but Splinter was really happy about my project and looked forward to it each day. It was cute.

* * *

May 8th: you make a killer beef stew.

And everybody killed each other to always get it.

* * *

June 23rd: that one time you kicked a homeless guy in the gut for hitting on Mama-April (before I was born).

Splinter has performed many heroic acts but I remember this one because the guy immediately threw up on Splinter's robe. I didn't want to include that, though.

* * *

July 4th: fireworks + you = fun, explosive times

He burned Leonardo one year. Actually two, and in the same spot.

* * *

August 7th: you're just too cool for school.

Summer isn't so bad on his bones. I was dancing to some old 80s hits, and Splinter stopped by my door and did the robot. I had to change underwear.

* * *

September 21st: you have a beautiful singing voice.

Hands down.

* * *

October 19th: when the girls on the soccer team tortured me day after day, you gave me the courage to stand up to them. I wanted to kick them in the face, like Uncles Raph and Don suggested, but you said to wait until after the semester was over and get them in a dark alley.

Do you know how many cool points he scored that day?

* * *

November 26th: you hoard snacks for me.

And he guarded them, too.

* * *

December 31st: you will always be immortal in my memory. I love you.

.. yeah, we were both being saps that day. Then we baked cookies in the shapes of math equations. Anger management, see?

* * *

When Splinter passed a few years later, I asked to read all three hundred and sixty SIX things at his eulogy. I didn't shed one tear because he knew every single one of them, and I couldn't be sad about that.

I don't want to end this lopsided essay on a sad note. My dad asked me to do the same thing for him, but I only came up with one hundred before the rest were just insulting.


End file.
